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Las mejores anécdotas de la relación entre pacientes y médicos

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Ir a la consulta del médico no es siempre lo más fácil del mundo, especialmente cuando tienes que explicar cuáles son tus dolencias. En cuestión de doctores todo el mundo sufre, en bastantes ocasiones, momentos de hipocondria y otras nos creemos que lo sabemos todo y esperamos hasta que a veces no hay solución.

Algunos especialistas se han desahogado en Reddit para revelar las cosas más incómodas, raras y ridículas que muchas personas les han mostrado, preguntado o han hecho revisar cuando les han ido a visitar. Aquí están algunas de las mejores.

Los expertos que atienden estos casos urgentes han revelado lo más raro que se han encontrado en la consulta. Recogemos los más llamativos

El olvidadizo

“Tenía un paciente que aseguraba que no podía doblar la rodilla y le pedí que se quitara los pantalones para poder examinar su pierna. Tras hacerlo, la razón por la que no podía moverla era porque tenía una escayola alrededor de ella. Al revisar sus citas vi que el hospital le había mandado varias cartas para que viniera a que se la retiraran, y como no había ningún registro donde pusiera que se la habían quitado, se dio por hecho que él mismo la habría eliminado”.

La ingenua

“Tuve que explicarle a una niña de 17 años y a su madre que en realidad no era alérgica al alcohol, que solo tenía resaca. Se quejaba de que en las noches que bebía demasiado vodka, por lo general sentía que tenía el estómago vacío, sufría naúseas y a veces vomitaba por la mañana. Pero no sucedía siempre y no tenía otros síntomas típicos de una reacción alérgica”.

Su hermana le contó que si dejaba de fumar durante el embarazo, el niño tendría mono y moriría

Las vergonzosas

“Una madre y una abuela trajeron a emergencias a la hija/nieta porque estaba sangrando. No era ningún trauma ni herida, la pobre había empezado a menstruar. La madre no quería explicar lo que le estaba pasando y lo que iba a ocurrir a partir de esa cita. Todo aquello tuvo un lado positivo, fue una visita rápida una vez que la examiné”.

El tragón

“El hijo de uno de mis pacientes se tragó un imán bastante grande. Pasó a su intestino y esperamos unas horas para que el pequeño fuese al baño y lo expulsara con las heces. Al día siguiente, cuando regresaron para el seguimiento, descubrimos que se había tragado otro y que había quedado pegado al primero formando una pared dentro del estómago y obstruyendo el intestino. Rápidamente lo trasferimos a urgencias y fueron extirpados quirúrgicamente de inmediato”.

La desmontable

“Mi padre es cirujano ortopédico y su especialidad es la cirugía de cadera y rodilla. Llora de risa cada vez que cuenta la historia de que algunas mujeres no entienden cómo se hace la operación y su preocupación por que les quiten la pierna, les arreglen esa parte cuerpo y luego se la vuelvan a colocar como si fueran un desmontable”.

La confiada

“Recibí una llamada por un derrame cerebral. La paciente tenía media cara paralizada y dificultad para hablar, los mismos síntomas que tuvo hace diez años con otro episodio que ya había sufrido. Me explicó que las señales habían aparecido cuatro días atrás y que en el mismo momento que le pasó ya sabía lo que le sucedía, pero que no acudió al hospital porque pensó que podría curarse sola y que desaparecería por sí mismo”.

El hipocondriaco de libro

“Hay un señor que siempre cree que tiene cáncer. Viene a la consulta cada día: si le duele el estómago, piensa que lo sufre ahí y así con cada parte del cuerpo en la que siente algo raro. La última vez vino a mi consulta porque tocarse las cejas algunos de sus pelos se cayeron. Estuvo llorando por lo menos media hora”.

¡Qué malo estoy! (iStock)

El arriesgado

“Hace unos meses un paciente que no sabía si era alérgico a un alimento, porque anteriormente había sufrido una reacción anafiláctica tras ingerirlo, pensó que estaría bien comérselo de nuevo para comprobar si había sido por eso. Antes de consultarme vino y se lo comió delante de mi (rápidamente sin que me diera tiempo a pararlo) para ver qué pasaba. Efectivamente era alérgico, pero no le recomiendo a nadie que le imite”.

Fueron al médico porque sangraba: les daba vergüenza explicar que a su familiar le había venido el periodo

Los crédulos

“Una pareja de jóvenes descubrieron que ella estaba embarazada. Tras un chequeo le pregunté que si fumaba y me respondió que alrededor de un paquete diario. Cuando le aconsejé que debía dejarlo, se negó en rotundo y se enfadó. Insistí en que eso era perjudicial para su futuro bebé y ella me contestó: “Bueno, mi hermana me dijo que si dejaba de fumar, el pequeño tendría abstinencia y moriría, por eso no lo dejo”.

La confiada

“Los signos estaban claros. Mi paciente iba a ser madre. Hablamos sobre si había posibilidades de que pudiera estar embarazada y ella lo negó rotundamente. Cuando seguí con nuestra conversación le pregunté sobre si había mantenido relaciones sexuales con hombres sin protección desde su última regla, respondió que sí, que efectivamente lo había hecho. Salí a por unos panfletos de información para que supiera lo que pasaba por tener sexo sin métodos anticonceptivos y supiera que estaba embarazada”.

Con información del Confidencial

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